| 12/31/05 New Year's Eve I awaken softly and the morning rises within me. I move toward the east and then to the west. I begin to clear away the clutter of what has become limiting and allow a new gender. My life takes on a new finding and I begin to nurture the left side more. I make ready an ease I am giving to the left side of my frame. The ring of commitment, the larger breast, the foot that follows, the eye that writes, the hand that steadies, the side of the mouth more silenced by the afraid. The day begins in the shadows of this writing and I sit at the lighted edge. (c) 2005 Raven Su.Sane |
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| 12/30/05 Sacred Collaboration Time and space complete a turn, and I see more clearly how often I return to the need of an inner resonance, that fills my heart and claims my soul. A resonance that I trust and give my voice to. This resonance is my Treasured Innocence and I have spent all my life finding it and have said no to many other sounds to keep it. I rise within my self today to claim my intention of listening and honoring what I hear as the sacred collaboration I have with the divine within me. (c) 2005 Raven Su.Sane |
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| 12/25/05 Raven's Flight into Christmas The night has enfolded me and the light that yields to the shift in cycle begins to enter. I become aware of the need to potentize my connection to the thread that now begins to appear. The blood red gift of its pulse has secured my life in a way I need, and I now feel it on many levels I have yet to understand. I feel paced, but not timed, open, but not spaced, fulfilled, but still empty. What is the room for and what is beginning to be lit within? My loved ones and family feel close, but all else feel far away. Closing a cycle, opening a new beginning. (c) 2005 Raven Su.Sane |
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| 12/23/05 Enough to Begin A wealth of feelings embark upon this day within me. I am searching through them to find which ones are truly me. Those are the ones I want to begin with. Entering upon the transformation of what needs to yield, I embody the strength of what I know. I know I have listened and followed and again I will listen and follow, so this is part of who I am. I know I hear, but I don't always understand, so I wait and I will wait again. I know I seek compassion and I will find it. This alone is enough for me to begin. (c) 2005 Raven Su.Sane |
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| 12/22/05 Solstice Solstice, a sacred opening into the light of a pinpoint idea. The light so small that you know it will now begin to open. Life becomes a small focus of one idea and you see that if you just follow it you will find the sacred you seek cradled in hope and light. I feel cradled at this time. I am very small in a large room that is full of potential that I have yet to become. (C) 2005 Raven Su.Sane |
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| 12/20/05 Our Anniversary Today our anniversary, 18 years, we both feel the shift in our lives. We have painted, written, played, and worked together and now we pour our love into the present. Robert has always been my knight in shining armor and the hero in every story for me. I have never been so nurtured and protected by anyone as he has always done. We are two strong wills and we never compromise, but we do see where what we know comes together. He is my Raven Man and I am his Raven Woman, and we travel the deep mystery hand in hand, palm to palm, head to head, heart to heart. (c) 2005 Raven Su.Sane |
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| 12/19/05 Pour into the Beginning Up early, beautiful Gemini moon last night. Excited about how all things are falling into place. Within a dream there is a time called the middle and in this place all things are unfinished, waiting, in complete in perception. In this place we often feel we have lost the thread of who we are, what we have done, and what we wait for. The thread is invisible and we must remain loyal to its presence. When we first came to Maine 7 years ago, we had stepped fully into the middle, we felt the excitement of feeling the beginning change, but the desert of the middle seemed to engulf us at times. The middle is essential, because it is what holds the beginning and the end together. It is the bridge between what we learn and what we know. We have survived the middle and now we know what we need to pour into the beginning. (c) 2005 Raven Su.Sane |
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| 12/15/05 Birthday Move Restless night between excitement about moving in to studio school, cold temperatures in loft, crinkly space blankets and checking on Lily, our little Pomeranian, to see if she stayed under space blanket for warmth. What a funny adventure Robert & I make out of the most everyday. We are a bit ridiculous at times, but inside the structure of Real life, I do believe, there is plenty of room for the ridiculous. Pink sky rising as I move to sit deeper into this time, so that I keep my heart, mind, and intuition together at the same pace. I must remember purpose, so I don't get tangled into push and problems. As long as I touch into the fact that all is really ready, and the corner fairies have really set the studio into order, I will be able to feel the gift. Today is my daughter, Susanna's, 22nd birthday. She is such a strong and dear young woman and kindred spirit. She has 2 17 month-old twin boys and is expecting, March 12th, her 3rd son. She has, since she was 5, help develop the concepts of creative foundation, so it is perfect on her birthday that we are moving. (c) 2005 Raven Su.Sane |
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| 12/14/05 Pace In the Rhythm Up within the rhythm of my dreams. Pacing myself, even before I awaken. Felt busy all night, but rested this morning. Dreams working their way through the patterns of our lives, I realize that the current is being widened. This day being a widened current. Today we hang our art in the studio school and make ready for the big move tomorrow. We set the pieces in the studio last night, so they could begin to calculate the room and re-calculate what was needed to widen the current. Of course, some of our friends; The Wild Things, Pipi Longstockings, Nicki, the Nature Detective, Linnia and Alice in Wonderland, had to sit on shelves to start to get used to their new space and make plans for how the studio should be. This all helps to keep the pace in a rhythm instead of a chaotic run. (c) 2005 Raven Su.Sane |
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| 12/13/05 Doorway of White Centered in the middle, I get up to snow and more snow. People in Maine love their snow and are disappointed if they don't get a lot. It amazes me how they love the magic, Christmas trees don't go down until the end of January and sometimes February. Wreathes stay up till spring. I love living in a part of the world that surrenders to the deep pitch of Black and the cover of white. The morning gives me room and I take in deeper the vastness of what I now enter in my life.-- Doorway of White. (c) 2005 Raven Su.Sane |
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| 12/11/05 She Picks Me Up White morning, trying to slip into a space that the magic of snow resides. Too many layers in front of the silence and peace of snow. I come to a place of white and I begin to write. I long for the meaning of deep play and how it soothes me. I ask all the grace within me to wrap around me so I can feel room. I sleep in black to feel more room in my dreams. I begin to see a tiny light. It is Kuan Yin who always lights my way when I have stepped into small. She says keep to small; small toys, small puzzles, small moments. She is the large that picks me up into her arms. (c)2005 Raven Su.Sane |
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| 12/5/05 Become Ready Up within the sleep of early musings, I begin with the Oracle of Compassion that peels back the layers of the mind. I fold into the words and sit into the feeling of home within a world that often feels none. I speak in red and allow the fire of who I am to ignite the creative passion of this day. I pour into the feeling and I become ready. (c) 2005 Raven Su.Sane |
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| 12/1/05 Opening Opening to this day early, Robert & I get up hungry and excited about many things. Much has moved over the last few days and we are within the pattern of an immense change. The studio school, becoming the vessel we pour our life work into. To pour out, to become holy to one's self, to become filled by the void. Christmas, being a way to reveal color to the world, we prepare to step into its wondrous time. We move between the layers of Black & White onto a palette of full color. (c) 2005 Raven Su.Sane |
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